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Not so long ago I was approached by an anxious parent. She told me she was so mad and worried she didn’t know what to do! Her teenage boy apparently did something inexcusable and she is finding herself unable to forgive him. Her question was, “How do I let him know I love him even though I am mad at him for making a mistake?” One of the most difficult parts of being a parent is learning to accept our children’s mistakes. We can certainly advise other parents on the subject, but when it comes to our own kids, it’s easier said than done! You see, our love for our kids is a powerful and sometimes destructive tool; just like anger caps an iceberg of a mix of hidden emotions. Love is an inverted iceberg showing various emotions and hiding love.
When we see our kids as an extension of who we are; our limiting beliefs, our old mistakes, and memories cloud our judgment. Their mistakes become our mistakes and their failures become our failures. It becomes very easy for us to judge them according to standards we set for ourselves.
What we need to remember here is that our kids are unique individuals doing the best they can with the limited resources they have collected up to date. Each mistake they make is an opportunity for them to learn, grow and gain new resources. So, next time your child makes a mistake—and believe me it will happen-–stop to think…
“What emotion do I want to bring to the surface and express my love with? Anger or calmness, disappointment or encouragement, blame or forgiveness, anxiety or composure, fear or acceptance?”
My advice to my client was, “Have you tried telling him?” With this intense realization, tears came to her eyes. “No,” she said, “I haven’t. But I will now.” Final tips:

“I Can” is a kids self-development and coaching organization. Our mission is to empower kids and help them grow their mindset, see their strengths and learn to create a successful life with powerful self-confidence and self-esteem. Our programs are result oriented and designed for kids between 8 to 12 years old.
“I CAN” programs are licensed by the International Coach Federation (ICF) and utilized by coaches in more than 20 countries across the world.
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All our programs are designed to be easy, fun and to create long-lasting change. The programs are delivered by our highly qualified coaches, through a combination of methods including, teaching, coaching, storing telling, and fun activities.